Distraction vs Avoidance

Angry Birds, wii party, reading novels and dare I admit it, Blogging!   All of these can be helpful distractions, and yet, there comes a point when distraction slips into avoidance.

I had the first proper DBT sessions this week.  First the Skills Group, then next day the one to one with Joy.  This is how it is now and every week, twice a week for a whole year.  In fact the person leading the group session said 12-14 months!  Even after all the pre-commitment work it is a daunting prospect.

At the moment we are a small group (just 3).  We were all apprehensive.  I was very aware that both the others seemed a lot further on than me in terms of skills (even though two of us were new).  This was most evident when we looked at diary sheets.  They had both used lots of skills compared to my one.  I was quite ashamed of my comparatively blank sheet so when it was my turn I focussed on a question.

“Is what I have been doing distraction or avoidance?”

We concluded there is a fine line between the two.  When the activity is used as an alternative to unhelpful thoughts or behaviours it is distraction.  When the activity is used to numb the brain and feelings so you don’t have to address or acknowledge unhelpful thoughts, emotions or behaviours, then it is avoidance.  At the moment I think I am functioning at 70% / 30% in favour of avoidance.

So, Angry Birds, you might not be so helpful after all!